Living together with someone teaches many things people didn’t know before about his/her mate. A Reddit user asked ‘Married couples, what is the weird thing you found out from your spouse after living together?’ and here are 30 of the responses.
1.
Occasionally my wife will sit straight up in bed, but she is dead asleep. The first couple times she did it I thought she was going to go to the bathroom or drink some water but she just sat there. I tried talking to her and when she didn’t respond I realized she was asleep. Horrifying.
I’m used to it now, so I just rub her back and quietly tell her “Lay down it’s time to sleep.” and she will lay back down. Apparently she reflexively punched her ex in the eye once because he didn’t realize she was asleep and he woke her up. Pass. Not getting punched by you beautiful creepy wife.
Ah love.
2.
My husband is terrible at finding things. It can be front and center at eye level in the fridge and he can’t find it! I used to hide his presents by putting them in the open on a chair in our bedroom — I called it my ‘super-secret’ hiding spot.
3.
My husband has no off switch. If I’m not listening, he just talks to himself. He has full on conversation in the shower. He pauses YouTube videos in the middle to give commentary. He’s pretty much only quiet when he sleeps, and then he snores! I love him to bits though. The house feels weird when he’s not here chattering away.
4.
She talks in her sleep. And not like “I forgot milk”. Like “Do you think hot dogs are steak d***s?” or “COSMIC-SHEEP WHERE ARE THE FREAKIN BAGELS GO FIND THE BAGELS” (the latter said while staying at a friend’s mountain cabin forty five minutes from town at 2 AM).
Relationships are magical.
5.
HE EATS DEVILED EGGS WITH SUCH A FEROCITY. He will literally forget to take breaks in between eggs in order to breathe. … he’ll start freakin sweating…
My mother did not believe me so made some for him for Christmas and got to witness the horror first hand.
For context he’s a pretty fit dude who eats most of his meals normally.
6.
She likes to walk around the house with one sock on and one sock off.
7.
When eating Oreos, she takes a mug filled with milk and places the Oreo in the mug, she then takes a spoon and scoops it out of the milk and eats the Oreo off of the spoon. Why else would God have given us fingers if not for using to dip Oreos I say?
Once when we were at my in-law’s home, she was eating Oreos this way and I started giving her s**t about it. Then I look around the room and see her dad, mom, and three sisters just looking at me; all holding their mugs of milk and Oreos with spoons to extract said Oreos from the milk. Foot, meet mouth.
8.
My husband takes his shirt off to poop, I’m not sure why.
9.
Apparently my wife does not poop. We have been together for about 15 years and not once have I caught her cr*pping. It’s disturbingly strange. Maybe she’s an alien.
10.
Her shoes. Shoes in living room, shoes in the hall, shoes in the bathroom, shoes in the other bathroom, shoes under the kitchen table, shoes under the coffee table, shoes next to the coffee table, shoes in her trunk, shoes in my trunk. Shoes next to the bed, shoes under the bed, shoes on the bed. Shoes.
